Self Care

How To Create Positivity from Missed opportunities

I had an experience last week that got me thinking about missed opportunities and the things that we participate in that we think are beneficial, but it turns out they aren’t. The question is what do we do with those missed opportunities? What do we do when a door closes? We pick up and start over. Here’s how to turn a missed opportunity into something positive. As the saying goes, turn lemons into lemonade.

How to find positivity in missed opportunities

When One Door Closes


This story is such a first world problem. It’s so inconsequential when we look at the big picture, but sometimes the smallest things can teach us the greatest lessons. I was apart of a Facebook group for bloggers where we can promote our blog using the daily threads. I have been a regular participant in this group for a while and always did my best to give more than I take. I’d always engage with the other bloggers on the threads. Whether it be liking social media posts on their accounts, commenting, or sharing their blog posts.If you know me, you know that I always try to go above and beyond to do things the right way. Especially when it involves helping other people. It was a shock to me that I was suddenly muted and could no longer respond to the other comments or post. There were days when I couldn’t respond until late in the day because I’m a busy mom. I make my original comments in the morning and then go back throughout the day to help the other bloggers. That is what’s always worked for me.

At first, I got mad because by doing that, they were basically accusing me of dropping my link and running. Then I was disappointed because I couldn’t participate for another month, but I quickly realized that maybe that group wasn’t the place for me anyway. When I thought about it, most of the bloggers in that group aren’t apart of my niche. While their content is great and they were super helpful, there wasn’t much of a connection. They aren’t the people that will become my clients. I could’ve waited a month and then tried to figure out what I had done wrong. Then I could spend time making sure I followed every rule, but for what?

I had to ask myself, how is this benefiting me? Is it helping my blog or coaching practice grow? How does it make me feel to be apart of this group now? It wasn’t giving my blog that much of a boost and I no longer felt welcome in the group. In the past, rejection hit me hard and while I felt a touch of that, I turned it around to something positive.

Woman looking through open door into the unknown

How To Move On

I started looking for groups that were geared towards busy moms, coaches and female bloggers. I found several that I have joined and so far, they’ve been wonderful groups. The best part is that they’ve given my blog a boost and the women are awesome. There is a supportive environment where we help each other. If you are interested in joining any of these groups, find their links at the end of this post.

How to bounce back when one door closes

Journal Prompts

How about you?
Are there any doors that have closed for you lately? How are you feeling about these experiences now? Here are some prompts to dive into if you use journaling to get your thoughts out. If you aren’t much of a writer, don’t worry about it. Just answer these questions in your head. The answers are all within you.

  • Describe your last missed opportunity.
  • Is this a positive or negative thing for you?
  • Did a better opportunity open up as a result?
  • If not, how can you turn it into a new opportunity?

  • List your first three steps for creating your next opportunity.

Finding Clarity

This process also works if you are trying to decide if a. New opportunity is right for you or if you need to get out of a situation. This could be a relationship, friendship or anything work related. Of course, we have to do things we don’t want to do at times. It’s a fact of life, but we can change our mindset. When deciding if something is right for you, answer these questions to get clarity.
  • How does it make you feel in your body?

  • If you let this thing go, what will happen?(pros and cons)

  • What are you giving up by moving on?
  • What are you giving up if you stick with it?
  • What are you gaining from moving on?
  • What are you gaining by staying where you are?

What is meant for you won’t pass you by.

When thinking about doors opening and closing in life, I try to remember this quote. “What is meant for you won’t pass you by.” This applies in business, relationships, purchases, friendships etc. What doors have opened or closed for you lately? Tell me in the comments. If you’d like to talk about creating amazing opportunities in your own life, feel free to book a discovery call to see how we can work together. I’d love to hear from you!

As promised, here are the Facebook groups I mentioned above.

Mom Blog Network Personal Development and Wellness Bloggers

Successful Mom Entrepreneurs Women’s Side Hustle Network

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35 Fall Journal Prompts for Self Reflection

Technically, autumn is not here yet, but the leaves are changing color and the weather is getting a bit cooler. At least it is here in the northeast where I am. When the seasons change, it is a good time to stop and reflect. You can figure out what you want to do with the remainder of the year, explore personal growth topics or simply have fun writing about new and old fall memories. Here are 35 fall journal prompts to help you fill those blank pages.

35 Fall Journal Prompts for Inspiration

Goal Setting

The last quarter of the year is a perfect time for goal setting. Prioritize and outline a plan to achieve your goals by the end of the year with these journal prompts.

  • What are your goals for the next three months?
  • How important are these goals? Put them in order.
  • If you were to achieve these goals, how will your life change?
  • What might block you from achieving these goals?
  • How can you remove these blocks?
  • What steps can you take to achieve your goals? (List out steps for each goal)
  • What is one step you can take today to achieve at least one of your goals?
  • How will you feel when you accomplish these goals?
  • How will you feel if you don’t achieve them?
  • What has helped you accomplish goals in the past?

35 autumn journal prompts

Seasonal Prompts

Enjoy these fun seasonal prompts.

  • What feels different about the fall?
  • What are your fall traditions?
  • What fall traditions would you like to create?
  • What is your favorite Halloween memory?
  • If you could cast one magical spell, what would it be?
  • What is your favorite Thanks Giving memory?
  • What are you grateful for?
  • What are your favorite fall foods?
  • Describe your perfect fall day.
  • Take some fall photos and make a photo collage. Write any thoughts you may have.

Fall journal prompts for self reflection

Self Discovery

Use these journal prompts to explore your thoughts and feelings.

  • How does your self-care routine change in the fall?
  • What do you need to let go of?
  • What is the biggest change you’ve ever made in your life?
  • What is the scariest thing you’ve ever done?
  • What are you afraid of?
  • Name 50 things you are grateful for.
  • What season of life are you in and why?
  • What would you like to achieve by next fall?
  • What are you excited to do each day?
  • How do you define beauty?
  • What are you open to receiving?
  • If you have kids in school, how do you feel about them returning to school this year?
  • What is your biggest struggle right now?
  • What is your biggest source of joy right now?
  • What do you need to do to prepare for winter?

Let me know if you find these fall journal prompts useful. Do your journaling habits change with the seasons or are you just getting started with journaling? Let’s talk about it in the comments.

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Are You Valuing You?

Are you valuing your value?

Let that sink in. Do you really see your value and are you allowing others to see it?

Valuing your valueTo figure this out, reflect on how you respond to people and the boundaries you set. In friendships or relationships

Are people respectful of your time and how do you respond?

Do you drop plans for people or do you expect to be contacted in a reasonable amount of time?

If people flake out on you, do you bother to get back with them?

Once in a while is fine and understandable, but if this is a patern for you, you may have some work to do.

Hour glass next to laptop. Valuing your time.

Valuing Your Time

If you value your own time, others will as well. Of course, being flexible is a wonderful trait to have. There may be times when people contact you last minute to get together or people may make you wait. If this is a constant for you, you may want to look at your schedule and how valuable your time is. This is one way to create boundaries and know that your time is valuable. You don’t have to say yes to everything especially if it interferes with your schedule.

Ask yourself these questions to know if the request is that important.

  1. Do I really want to do this or do I feel obligated?
  1. Is this person/activity a priority?
  1. Will it fit in with my current schedule?
  1. Will doing this make me feel good or will I feel tired or drained?

You’re a gem

Surrounding Yourself with Positivity

Do those closest to you respect where you are in life?

This is important. Are your family and friends interested, excited or positive about what you do? Of course, not everyone is going to be interested in everything, but if your friends can’t show some positivity or encouragement, maybe it’s time to rethink the relationship. If you feel dragged down, devalued or drained after a meeting with this person, perhaps they don’t see your value.

This goes for relationships as well. Does your partner value your characteristics? If you are driven, successful, inteligent etc, is your partner turned off by that. If he or she is the right person for you, they wouldn’t be. I’m speaking from experience here, but if your partner doesn’t value your goals, who you are and the path that you are on in life, it’s definitely time to move on.

Happy woman with shopping bags. Value concept.

Make Yourself a Priority

Finally, do you value you?

I mean do you really? Do you give your goals and dreams the time and attention they deserve? Do you make time for these things in your schedule or do you put them on the back burner because you are too busy taking care of kids, being a wife/girlfriend, cooking and cleaning or doing a meaningless job that you are constantly on the verge of quitting? If you are, it’s time to look at your values.

Grab a notebook and start brainstorming with these four questions.

  • What are your top five goals?
  • What are your values?
  • How do your goals reflect those values?
  • What is one step you can take today to move you towards accomplishing at least one goal?

The step can be very small. For example, if your goal is to start a blog, one step would be to brainstorm name ideas. Step number two could be to purchase a domain. If you don’t know what a domain is, then your step number two would be to research on domains. If one of your goals is to read four books per month, then your first step could be to choose a book. Next step, read five pages. You get the idea. It doesn’t matter which goal you choose to work on, but make it something valuable to you. Once you start seeing the value in yourself, others will follow suit.

Are you valuing you?Are you an overwhelmed mom who doesn’t know where to start? Have you lost yourself and don’t even know what your goals or values are anymore? If so, I’d love to help you. Schedule a discovery call with me and we can discuss strategies that will help you feel like that valuable mama I know you are!

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40 Summer Journal Prompts to Keep You Inspired

Since summer is the half way point in the year, some people find it helpful to reflect on the previous months or to think about what they want to accomplish for the rest of the year. One way to do this is through journaling, so I have gathered a list of some of my favorite prompts for the summer. They include prompts for goal setting, creativity or reflection. There is a journal prompt here for everyone. Enjoy this list of summer journal prompts to keep you inspired.

Journal prompts for summer 2020

Summer Prompts

  • Does summer feel different than other seasons to you? Why or why not?
  • Does your family have any summer traditions? What makes them special?
  • What part of summer do you look forward to the most every year? Why?
  • Take your journal outside and describe your surroundings. How are you feeling? What are you noticing?
  • What is your favorite summer memory from your childhood?
  • Create a summer bucket list.
  • Write a love letter to your body.
  • What is your favorite summer treat? How would you describe it?
  • What is your favorite outdoor activity? How can it translate into other areas of your life?
  • What are your favorite summer self-care ideas? Which ones can you do this week?
  • What does your dream summer day look like?

40 Summer Journal PromptsJournal Prompts for Reflection and Growth

  • What do you need to forgive yourself for?
  • Who do you need to forgive? Write an unsent letter to them.
  • If you could travel into the past, what would you do?
  • If you could travel into the future, what would you do?
  • Write about your biggest life changing moments.
  • What is the most valuable lesson life has taught you?
  • Describe the happiest version of yourself.
  • What do you do when people are unsupportive?
  • How do you know when to let go?
  • Make a list of the treasures in your life.

40 summer journal prompts

Prompts for Goal Setting

  • What quotes remind you of your goals and dreams?
  • What goals have you accomplished in the past six months?
  • Have your goals changed from the beginning of the year?
  • Have you accomplished what you wanted to so far this year? Why or why not?
  • What are your goals for the rest of the year?
  • Where do you see yourself in five years?
  • Where do you see yourself in ten years?
  • If you could attract anything into your life, what would it be?
  • What does success mean to you?
  • What holds you back from achieving your goals?
  • What are your goals for the month?

Journal Prompts for Creativity

  • What do you like to create?
  • What kinds of things did you create as a child?
  • What creative hobbies would you like to try?
  • How has creativity helped you?
  • How are you unique?
  • Make a list of things you enjoy doing.
  • Take a photo of something beautiful.
  • Make a hand written card or write a letter to someone you love.

Woman writing in her journal

Do you have any favorite journal prompts that you like to use for the summer? Tell me in the comments. Happy writing!

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50 Affirmations and Quotes to Inspire Self Compassion and Kindness

How kind are you to yourself? If your friend was going through a rough time and you were comforting her, would you say the same things to yourself if you were in a similar situation? I’m guessing you’d be a whole lot harder on yourself. In most cases, we are our own worst critics.

I was on a conference call with two other coaches. One of them asked how we were going to be kind to ourselves this week. She wanted us to come up with a mantra or affirmation that we could tell ourselves to show some self compassion. She reminds us that we are human. We make mistakes, but we do the best we can. We need to look at ourselves with the same kindness and compassion that we give to others. When it was my turn to speak, I honestly couldn’t think of anything. I stumbled over my words and totally drew a blank. However, if you asked what was one kind thing I could say to a friend, a family member or even a stranger, I could come up with something in a second. Eventually, I said, “I’ll show myself some patience and forgiveness when I make a mistake.”

50 quotes and affirmations to inspire self love

I felt very put on the spot, but I realized that I’m generally not kind to myself. I have no idea how many times a day I put myself down in my head. If I kept track, it would probably be shocking. I would never do that to someone else, so why would I do that to myself? I know I’m not the only one who struggles with this, so I was inspired to create this list of 50 self kindness and compassion quotes and affirmations to remind you to be. Kinder to yourself.

You can copy and paste these to print or put up on your wall. You can add them to a screen saver or image on your phone. You can create a vision board, write them in a notebook or create your own affirmations. Use these quotes to inspire self kindness in a way that resonates with you.

50 quotes and affirmations to inspire kindness and self love

Affirmations

  • I am worthy of love.
  • I am worthy of infinite and unending compassion.
  • I deserve love, compassion, and empathy.
  • I am powerful, confident, and capable of reaching all my dreams.
  • I have a warm and caring heart.
  • I am exactly who I need to be in this moment.
  • All of my decisions are inspired from inner wisdom and compassion.
  • I am a beautiful person.
  • I love and treasure my body.
  • I honor and respect my limitations.
  • Happiness flows freely from me.
  • Love rises from my heart in the face of difficulty.
  • I have infinite capacity for love and affection.
  • I am successful.
  • I believe in the person I dream of becoming.
  • I carry strength and resilience with me.
  • I have the ability to overcome any challenge life gives me.
  • Changing is never simple but it’s easier if I stop being hard on myself.
  • My mistakes just show that I’m growing and learning.
  • It’s okay to make mistakes and forgive myself.
  • I am free to let go of others’ judgments.
  • My life is a celebration of my accomplishments.
  • My every step is one of courage.
  • Abundance and love flow from me.
  • I honor my own life path.

Rose quartz heart. The stone of love and compassion.

Quotes

“Self-compassion is simply giving the same kindness to ourselves that we would give to others.” Christopher Germer

“We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.” Mary Dunbar

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Sharon Salzberg

“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” Brené Brown

“Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.” Malcolm S. Forbes

“There is a magnificent, beautiful, wonderful painting in front of you! It is intricate, detailed, a painstaking labor of devotion and love! The colors are like no other, they swim and leap, they trickle and embellish! And yet you choose to fixate your eyes on the small fly which has landed on it! Why do you do such a thing?” C. JoyBell C.

“Did your mom ever tell you, ‘If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything’? She was right–and talking nicely also applies when you’re talking to yourself, even inside your head.” Victoria Moran

“You’re always with yourself, so you might as well enjoy the company.” Diane Von Furstenberg

“I love myself for I am a beloved child of the universe and the universe lovingly takes care of me now.” Louise Hay

“Often, it’s not about becoming a new person, but becoming the person you were meant to be, and already are, but don’t know how to be.” Heath L. Buckmaster, Box of Hair: A Fairy Tale

“You can succeed if nobody else believes it, but you will never succeed if you don’t believe in yourself.” William J. H. Boetcker

“I was once afraid of people saying ‘Who does she think she is?’ Now I have the courage to stand and say ‘This is who I am.’” Oprah Winfrey

“A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change the course of your life.” Christopher K. Germer

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony.” – Mahatma Gandhi

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”―Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

“An important aspect of self-compassion is to be able to empathically hold both parts of ourselves–the self that regrets a past action and the self that took the action in the first place.”—Marshall Rosenberg, Non-Violent Communication

Woman drawing heart and looking at her reflection in the mirror

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.”—Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”—Steve Furtick

“When you say ‘Yes’ to others make sure you are not saying ‘No’ to yourself.” —Paulo Cohelo

“Flowers don’t open and close according to whose walking by. They open and show their beauty regardless.” Rebecca Campbell – Light Is The New Black

“Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.” Confucius

“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” – Jean Shinoda Bolen

Learning to love yourself is like learning to walk—essential, life-changing, and the only way to stand tall.” – Vironika Tugaleva

“There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling leaves and remember that it is enough to be taken care of by myself.” – Brian Andreas

50 quotes and affirmations for kindness and self compassion

Do you have a favorite affirmation or quote that you use to be kind to your self? Tell me in the comments.

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How to Stay Connected While Social Distancing

Things are starting to slowly reopen, but we’ve spent the last couple of months in our homes. Depending on where you are living, things may not be fully open yet and it’ll be a while before we can resume a life where we go out to dinner with friends, have birthday parties, play dates, book groups, fitness classes etc. A lot of us haven’t seen family members in months and our networks that were there before may be gone. This can make life extremely isolating for moms. Especially single moms who may have no one else to depend on.

Mother and daughter using Laptop

Being an introvert, I miss some people, but I’m okay with having a lot of alone time. However, some people thrive on being connected with others and this time has been especially difficult for them. Our children struggle with this as well. Rosebud misses her friends. She loves playing with other kids and having the structure that preschool provided. One of my goals for NMC Coaching is to connect like-minded moms. The isolation can be overwhelming in normal times, but the pandemic has created a whole new set of challenges surrounding isolation. This gave me an idea to create this list of ways to stay connected to loved ones and or to meet new people.

How to stay connected while social distancing

Virtual Play Dates

Many people are using Zoom or FaceTime for meetings now, but kids are getting on it as well to talk to each other. Depending on the ages of your children and their level of interest, meeting over FaceTime can be a good way for kids to stay connected. This works for you moms to stay connected with your friends too. Here are some ideas for virtual play dates.

  • Read stories,
  • Have the children play with similar toys,
  • Draw pictures to share with each other.

Family Game Night

Virtual Game Night.

This is perfect for families who are used to getting together to play games or have parties. People have gotten creative with game ideas for virtual get togethers. It can be a fun way to pass the time and feel connected with others.

For more ideas, check out this post, Hhow to plan a virtual game night.

Virtual Book Club

One way to connect with others is through common interests. If book club is your thing, there are many of them going on virtually now. Some meet over Zoom and others are just simple Facebook groups where you have online discussions. This can be a great way to meet new people.

How to stay connected with loved ones or meet new people

Online Courses

If you are interested in anything, there seems to be an online course for it. You can learn about blogging, creative writing, business, Crystal healing, nutrition and cooking to name a few. There are universities offering free college courses and many low cost short E-courses on websites like Udemy. There are different formats as well. Some are courses that you take on your own, but others involve Zoom meetings and or Facebook Groups which I’d recommend if you are taking a class to connect with others. There are offerings for children as well. I’ve seen story time, yoga classes and even preschool held over Zoom.

Find a Common Goal

Are you working towards weight loss? Are you starting a business? Are you working on home improvements? Maybe you’re just working on being your best self. Whatever your goal, there is a vertual group that you can get involved in.

I have several goals around blogging and my coaching business, so I’ve found groups where I can connect with others who are working on similar goals. We work together to share ideas and hold each other accountable. Make a list of five to ten goals and then pick one or two to focus on. Chances are, there are others who will be working along side you. I’ve been using an app called Active for my fitness goals. While I prefer to work on this alone, they have programs you can follow and ways within the app to connect with other people. Sometimes an accountability partner or a cheer leader is all you need to crush those goals!

Friends chatting over coffee

Search for Locals

Just because you can’t meet in person yet doesn’t mean you can’t connect now. There are apps that connect local people for friendship such as Bumble BFF. There are local communities/groups on Facebook that are based on interests in your local area. Some ideas for mom groups include

  • Moms from a specific city or town,
  • Baby wearing,
  • Moms of toddlers,
  • Breast-feeding moms,
  • Working moms,
  • Homeschooling moms,
  • Crunchy moms.

You get the idea. If you have passions outside of motherhood, that is great too!

Maybe you are interested in crafts, DIY or volunteering in your local community. Do a quick search to see what’s out there in your community. Who knows. You might find a new friend or your next amazing opportunity!

Support

If you are struggling with a specific challenge such as a chronic illness, mental health issues, death/grief etc, there are so many support groups out there. There are many on Facebook, but there are also specific websites made for this purpose. If you do a search for a support group related to your specific challenge, you will get results. You can narrow it down by location if you wish. It can be difficult when you are isolated while trying to deal with these additional challenges, but there are lots of people who want to be supportive and helpful. If you are struggling, please reach out to someone you are comfortable talking to. If you know someone who is struggling, please reach out to them as well. It can make all the difference for people to know that someone cares.

How to stay connected and feeel less isolatedAs you can see, there are many reasons and ways to connect with others online. While it’s not ideal for many of us, it has become our new normal for the time being. If we are able to focus on the positive, we can remind ourselves that we can stay in touch with our loved ones, we can meet people we would have never met otherwise, we can learn new things and most of all, this too shall pass. How are you staying connected with your loved ones? Have you done anything creative to bring people together virtually? Tell us in the comments.

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31 Journal Prompts for Mother’s Day

I want to wish everyone a happy Mother’s Day! I know Mother’s Day looks different this year, but hopefully you’ve found creative ways to celebrate the moms in your life. I’ve created this list of 31 journal prompts to help you do that. You can use these for self reflection, preserving memories or maybe you want to use some of these questions to get to know your own mom better. These prompts can be used for grandmothers, aunts or any mother figures in your life. You can either use these prompts in order over the next month or just use the prompts that resonate with you. They are meant to be a starting point. Enjoy these Mother’s Day journal prompts.

31 Journal Prompts for Mother’s Day

Lessons Learned

Use these prompts to reflect on lessons learned and to become clear on the lessons you want to teach your children.

  • What is the most important lesson you learned from your mom?
  • What did your mom teach you about love?
  • What did your mom teach you about work?
  • What lessons have you learned from your mom about parenting?
  • What are some important lessons you want your children to learn?

Love and Gratitude

Use these prompts to express your love and gratitude for the people and things you appreciate in life.

  • What do you love about your mom?
  • What do you love about being a mom?
  • What do you love most about your children?
  • What does your ideal Mother’s Day look like?
  • Who are your female role models?

Mother and Daughter dressed up

Making Memories

Use these prompts to remember the good times.

  • What’s your favorite memory of your mom?
  • What are your favorite memories so far with your children?
  • What did you do on your first Mother’s Day after becoming a mom?
  • What do you still want to do with your mother or children?
  • What’s your favorite childhood memory?

Family Traditions

Use these prompts to think about past and future family traditions.

  • What’s your favorite tradition from childhood?
  • What’s your favorite family recipe?
  • What traditions have you started with your own children?
  • What does Mother’s Day mean to you?
  • What is your family story?

Mother writing in her journal with breakfast in bedGrowth and Change

Use these prompts for personal development and self discovery.

  • How have you changed since becoming a parent?
  • How has your relationship changed with your mother over the years?
  • What do you wish your mom would have done differently?
  • How has your mom influenced your life choices?
  • What are your parenting goals?

Getting to know each other

These questions are for mothers and daughters to use to learn new things about each other.

  • What are your big dreams?
  • What do you wish you had done, but haven’t yet?
  • What are your goals for the next decade?
  • What’s one story you’d like to pass down to younger generations?
  • What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
  • What is the best thing about having a daughter or being a daughter?

31 Journal prompts for Mother’s DayI hope you find these prompts useful either for your personal journaling practice or to share with your mom. Have a wonderful Mother’s Day where ever you are in your parenting journey. Stay healthy and stay safe. How are you celebrating this Mother’s Day? Tell me in the comments.

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How To Show Self Compassion

How are you doing? Where are you in this strange world we are living in? Maybe you are one of those people who is maximizing your time by taking courses, organizing your home or being productive with your work. Maybe you are on the other end of the spectrum and it’s all you can do to get out of bed and get dressed. Chances are, you are probably somewhere in the middle. Especially if you are a mom trying to hold down a job, homeschool kids and take care of the house. Where ever you are at this moment, I want to remind you to show some self compassion.

How To Show Self Compassion

I’m writing about self compassion today because it is a struggle I am having. Chances are, I’m not alone in this. When the stay at home orders first started, I was thankful that I had some extra time to put towards my coaching and this blog. I was excited to have extra time with my daughter. I always wanted to stay at home with her, so I was looking atthis as an opportunity. For the first couple of weeks, things were going great. I had lots of motivation and my daughter was loving having me at home.

Lonely little girl with teddy bear.

As time passes, I have lost the motivation to write which leaves me discouraged. I’ve also noticed behavioral changes in my daughter. She’s angry that she can’t go back to school and she misses her friends. She always tells me that she’s scared, but when I ask her what is scaring her she tells me, “monsters.” I’m wondering if it’s really monsters she’s scared of or is it something else. Is she scared that we may get sick? Is she scared of something she can’t put into words? She’s only four, so much of this is beyond her comprehension, but she is piecing things together and trying to make sense of it all. I’m trying to help her stay motivated with her learning, but she can’t focus. Quite frankly, neither can I.

Sad baby girl holding toy

Is it time to get back to the drawing board? Probably. We need to take a new approach. I’ve started with toy and book rotation, more snuggle time and a lot more going with the flow. As a coach, it’s my job to help others stay motivated and working towards achieving their goals, but I am only human and I am definitely feeling overwhelmed, sad and frusterated.

Your Challenges

What are your struggles?

  • Is it a lack of motivation?
  • Is it work/life balance?
  • Are your kids having trouble adjusting to the changes?
  • Are you unemployed and or in a career transition?
  • Is it cabin fever?

Whatever your challenges are, let’s start by being kind and compassionate with ourselves. We are in extraordinary circumstances.

Mother and daughter with a speech bubble that reads, kindness.

What is self compassion?

The definition of self compassion is is the extension of kindness, care, warmth, and understanding (instead of beratement and criticism) toward oneself when faced with shortcomings, inadequacies, or failures.

When I think of self compassion, I picture this situation. When your friend is going through a tough time, what do you tell them? If your friend tells you she let the kids eat junk food because she didn’t feel like cooking or that they sat in front of the tv for too long, what would you tell her? You would probably tell her to be kind to herself. You’d tell her to try again tomorrow and not to worry so much. You wouldn’t tell her that she’s a terrible mother for not feeding organic or putting the kids in front of the tv so that she can get a moment of peace. If we are kind and compassionate with our friends, why do we criticize ourselves for the same actions?

Mother holding child while working on laptop which reads, self compassion.

Tips for Self Compassion

1. Say kind things to yourself.

If those negative statements pop into your head when you lose motivation, snap at your children or forget to take care of yourself, try using a positive statement instead.

  • I will use calm words with my children.
  • I may be overwhelmed, but I am a good mother.
  • I will start fresh tomorrow.
  • I have achieved these goals and will achieve my goals in the future.

Whatever your negative self-talk is, think of positive statements to challenge these beliefs. Write them down if you have to.

2. Stop and practice gratitude.

Whether it is in your head, on paper or in your phone, stop and write a few things you are grateful for. It may bring you joy and help you feel centered again.

3. Practice self-care.

If you are able to take just a short break to something for your self, it can make all the difference. Here are some ideas.

  • Journaling,
  • Meditation,
  • Taking a walk,
  • Take a bubble bath,
  • Have your favorite drink or comfort food,
  • Read a book or maybe just one chapter.

4. Connect With Others

If you can’t seem to give your self any compassion, reach out to someone who will lift you up. Call a friend, a family member or others in your network. Sometimes, it helps to talk things out. You may come away with a new perspective or will feel better in knowing that someone else understands and has your back.

Where ever you are at this point, it is okay. If you are on fire with ambition, that’s awesome! If you are feeling down, be kind to yourself. If you and your kids are driving each other crazy, take a break if you can and find something you can enjoy. That’s what I’ve been doing this week. I’m taking care of myself so that when I come back, I will have more positive energy and a renewed sense of purpose. Most importantly, I am showing some self compassion and I hope these tips help you do the same.

How To Show Self Compassion

How are you and your children coping with all of this? Tell me in the comments.

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10 Self-care Tips for the Busy Mom

As moms, we are always jumping from one task to the next and taking care of ourselves is an after thought. What do you picture when you hear the term self-care? Maybe you picture days at the spa or a weekend at home in your pj’s with your favorite comfort foods. What if I told you that self-care can take 10 minutes or less? Here are my 10 self-care tips for busy moms that can be done in under 10 minutes.

10 Self-care tips for busy moms

You may be thinking 10 minutes is too short to make a difference. You might be dying to have a whole weekend to yourself, but let’s be realistic. A refresher is better than nothing and during this pandemic, most of us aren’t leaving the house anyway. If you regularly schedule these five to ten minute breaks in your routine, they will become a habit and it will start to add up and make a huge difference in your outlook, health and wellbeing. Okay, I know your busy, so let’s get to those self-care tips now.

Journaling

Journaling is one of my favorite self-care routines. I don’t journal as much as I’d like to, but journaling has so many benefits. Personally, it has helped me work through feelings, visualize my future, keep track of goals and ideas, remember my dreams and preserve memories. With all these ways that journaling can help you, why wouldn’t you want to try it? The great thing about journaling is that there is no right or wrong way to journal. You just write from the heart. If you are not much of a writer, you can make lists or even sketch instead. The best part for us busy moms is that you can journal in less than ten minutes. You can include it in your routine first thing in the morning or before you go to bed or maybe you find it more beneficial to jot down notes throughout the day. Here are some ideas to get you started.

  • A gratitude journal; make lists of what you are grateful for.
  • Write using journal prompts.
  • Write down your dreams when you wake up.
  • Write down your goals and big dreams each day.
  • Write about your day.
  • Make a journal using photos.

Morning meditation on the beach

Meditation

Many people use meditation as their form of self-care. There are numerous benefits of meditation. There are so many forms of meditation out there, so try several and figure out which meditations work best for you. Even if meditation is hard for you, just try to find a time to be in calm and stillness. We are always juggling and rarely get to stop to sit with our thoughts. There are many meditations that can be done in ten minutes or less like these.

Stretch Routines

If you are working at home now like I am, you may be sitting for hours at a time. It’s really important to get up and move around. A quick five to ten minute stretch routine is the perfect way to do that.


10 Self-care tips for busy moms

Workouts

If you have the energy and motivation, why not schedule a ten minute workout? If you are low on energy, doing even a short exercise routine is a great way to beat fatigue! If you have an exercise machine at home, do that, but if you don’t have any exercise equipment, I’ve got you covered. There are many strength based workouts that you can do from the comfort of your home that only use your body weight and can burn just as many calories.


Favorite Snack

What are your favorite snacks? This will look different for everyone and that’s okay. For some people self-care is grabbing their favorite comfort food and for other people self-care includes eating something healthy for their body. Whatever the case may be for you, prepare some of these snacks for you and your kids so you can have them throughout the week.75 Healthy Snack Ideas

No Bake Blueberry Protein Balls

Strawberry Granola Yogurt Bark

Looking Good to Feel Good

Maybe you don’t have time for a spa treatment or to do your regular makeup routine, but it’s so important to feel good about how you look. Since we are staying at home, many of us are not even bothering to get dressed or do our makeup. I don’t know about you, but when I’m not dressed and ready for the day, I don’t feel very motivated. Here are some ideas to help you look and feel good that take only a few minutes.

  • Put on your makeup.
  • Wear jewelry.
  • Do your nails.
  • Do a facial.
  • Style your hair in a different way.

Woman relaxing reading a book

Reading

Reading is one of my favorite activities because I learn new things or I can escape into the book depending on what I’m reading. Those are just a couple of benefits of picking up a book or listening on Audible. Reading doesn’t have to take up a lot of time. You can just read a few pages at a time, but if you totally get absorbed, that’s okay too.

Outside Time

How about taking that book outside and enjoying the peace that comes from being in nature? These days it can be harder to get out with our social distancing practices and stay at home orders, but as long as you keep these things in mind, you can still safely enjoy the outdoors. If you have a dog, take him for a walk. The dog needs to get out, so why not take this time for yourself as well? If you have a baby, it can be nice to just put them in the stroller and go enjoy the fresh air. Maybe you’re working and you can take your laptop outside. Being outside for a few minutes can bring some calm not only to yourself, but to your kids as well.

Creating a Peaceful Environment

This may be an aspect of self-care that you haven’t thought of. If you are working at home, think about the environment that you are working in. Is it uninviting? Is it complete chaos? One way to make your day more peaceful and or motivating is to change your environment in subtle ways. Here are some ideas.

  • Put pictures on your desk.
  • Add motivational quotes or affirmations where you see them.
  • Use crystals.
  • Add fresh flowers.
  • Use peaceful sounds like these.

https://youtu.be/UJZxtO9XNno

You deserve a break “Relax, restore, renew”

Social Connection

During this time of isolation, it’s so important to reach out to others. What’s better than a good chat with a friend? Maybe you want to reconnect with someone you haven’t talked to in a while or maybe you want to make some new connections. Whatever the case may be, reach out. It could make your day or someone else’s. It can also help us to slow down and listen and or be heard.

Self-care is so important, especially during these uncertain times. What are you doing to take care of yourself? Tell us in the comments.

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How To Sit With Your Feelings

In my last post, I talked about how we can use the time in quarantine for personal development. Coincidentally, an article came across my newsfeed about how there is this push to make ourselves a project during this time. While I agree that there has been a push to use this time to improve ourselves, I don’t see it as a bad thing. I see it as one way we can put positivity back into our lives. Also, I think if you see yourself as a project, it diminishes your worth. If you see yourself as a complete being that is constantly evolving, doesn’t that sound better?

Frowning woman Acknowledge feelings

Pay Attention to Your Feelings

That being said, the author brought up a really good point that I want to focus on. When there is a huge push to go, go, go, it is distracting. When we are constantly in motion, we don’t have time to sift through our feelings. While I think it is a great idea to do some personal development during this time, I encourage you to  incorporate working through these difficult feelings as a part of your routine.

Sitting With Our Feelings How to Deal with Difficult Feelings

This is a tragedy like no other in our lifetime. It is effecting everyone in different ways. People are losing their lives. Families are losing loved ones. To make things worse, family members can’t be with their loved ones who have to die alone. It’s heartbreaking even if you aren’t going through it. On the flip side, there are people getting sick, but they are fully recovering. The scary thing is you never know who will be the lucky ones. As this goes on, you might be feeling grief, sadness, worry and fear.

Then there is all the other stuff. You might be unemployed and not sure when you will get your next check. You might be worried about getting enough food or personal products. You can’t go see family members or friends. Schools are closed and you might be trying to homeschool your children. Children are missing their friends and normal routines. Students can’t have proms or graduation ceremonies. Vacations and weddings have been canceled. Then there are all the pregnant women who have their own set of challenges. It’s a scary and strange time and we all will have to deal with our feelings at some point.

Strategies for dealing with difficult feelings

Strategies to Cope With Strong Feelings

Simply acknowledge the feelings.

Recognize them, name them in your head and allow yourself to feel them.

Journal

Write everything down. Give yourself that safe space to let go of everything.

Release the feelings

For some people, it helps to wrip up or burn the paper after they’ve written about a negative event or negative feelings. It’s a way of releasing that negative energy from your mind and your physical space.

Other people just need to have a good cry or can release the feelings by doing something physical. You can either go for a walk, do a workout at home or take a bike ride.

Create

Some people work through feelings by creating something. You can use any kind of art, music or writing to express yourself.

Reach Out

Even though we are apart, we are all in this together. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a friend or family member. Sometimes just asking someone how they are doing can make all the difference. Mental health is so important and if you know someone who is struggling, please reach out to them. If you are struggling and need to talk to a therapist, don’t be afraid to reach out. It really can help to talk to someone.

Woman on the phone. Strategies for dealing with difficult feelings

If we all take this time now to work through how we are feeling, we will come out of this that much stronger. If you are one of those people who is constantly in motion distracting yourself, take a few minutes to stop and breathe. Let yourself feel even if it is hard. We will get through this eventually. Things will never quite be the same, but we will find our way down this new path together.

How are you? Coffee cups on table

How are you holding up during these tough times? Tell me in the comments.

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