Lessons Learned

How To Choose Your Word for 2020

January 12, 2020

I know this post is long overdue, but before I get to that, I want to wish you all a happy new year. I hope 2020 has started on a positive note for everyone, but if not, this post can point you in the right direction.

December was a busy month for me and I needed to take a break from the blog and although I’m posting today, I don’t know how often the entries will be coming. I suppose whenever I get inspired. I’ve really needed this break so that I can focus on other things. While I love the blog, I was having to devote way too much time to it. With being a single parent, working in a highly stressful job and dealing with other obligations, it was getting harder to carve out time for anything else, so I’ve had to rethink my priorities. I want the blog to be successful and I know that blogging is hard work, but I need to coast for a while. One of the reasons I’ve made this decision is because of the new year. I wrote in my journal and thought hard about what I want 2020 to look like.

Why one word instead of a New Years resolution?

I have always hated New Years resolutions. I make tons of goals for the new year, get excited about them and there’s a big push in January, but by February, everything gets dropped. Then there’s the guilt and all the negative self talk about why I didn’t accomplish my goals yet again. This year, I’m doing things differently. I’ve decided to choose one word to live by this year. I did this last year as well, but wasn’t really following it with intention. In order for this to work, you have to be passionate about the word you choose.

My word for 2020 is love. I chose the word love because after soul searching, I found that love was the most meaningful thing that I needed to work on for this year. Both for myself and others. This also means that all the goals I’ve chosen to work on for 2020 are connected to love in some way. some of my goals for the year include

Getting in better shape,

Being more present and patient with Rosebud,

Taking more time for self-care,

Changing my mindset,

Being in a loving relationship.

These goals all relate to taking care of myself or others. Having a connection between the goals will help to make them achievable. My intention for 2020 is love, but yours may be different. Maybe your word is action, happiness, mindful or change. It can be any word. Here are some suggestions if you are still having trouble coming up with a word.

How to Choose Your Word

1. Write in your journal about what you want 2020 to look like. Are there any common themes?

2. Brainstorm a list of words and see which word or group of words resonate with you the most.

3. Make a vision board using images, words and or quotes. Are there any words or themes that pop out at you?

4. If you are torn between two or three words, take time to think and then come back the next day. Do you have any new thoughts?

5. Be sure your word and and any goals connected to your word energize you. Think about intentional things that you can do every day to bring your word to life.

Be Intentional

For my word, love, I have thought about what I can do everyday to bring love into my life. I can practice self-love by exercising and taking care of my body daily. I can send out loving energy by writing down a gratitude list of things that I’m thankful for each day. I can reach out to people to increase the chance of finding a meaningful relationship. There are so many things I can do to bring love into my life and that is what I intend to do in 2020. How about you? Do you have a word for the year? What are your plans, dreams or goals for 2020? Tell me in the comments.

8 Comments

Blogging, Personal Development

How To Know When You Need A Break

November 4, 2019

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you may have noticed that I haven’t been posting regularly in the past couple of weeks. For the past several months, I’ve had posts scheduled for Mondays and Thursdays, but lately I can’t keep up. The ideas haven’t been flowing and I’ve been frustrated with the lack of traffic along with the amount of time I’ve had to devote to my blog. As much as I love writing, I feel like this has been an uphill battle. I still love blogging, but I really need a break. My life is also changing in a lot of ways and I need time to adjust and find a new routine. That being said, I will still post here on the blog. Maybe once a week. Maybe more depending on my mood and how much time I have for creating new content.

I wanted to share how I came to this decision. Maybe there’s something in your life that you need a break from, but you are still unsure. Maybe you need a break altogether or just need to cut back. Here are just a few ways to know when you need a break.

Stress Level

Are you overwhelmed and or stressed? If something is completely stressing you out, then maybe you need a break. If it’s not absolutely necessary, don’t be afraid to stop whatever it is. Maybe you took on too many projects. Maybe you want to declutter your whole home, but have no idea where to start. Maybe you are saying yes to too many people. Whatever it is, step back and ask yourself, is this essential to my everyday life?

If cutting it out altogether isn’t an option or if you start to feel guilt, the nest step is figuring out how to make the task more manageable. If you need to declutter your home, start with one room. If that is too much, do one shelf or drawer. Then keep working at it a little each day. If it’s blogging related, can you outsource some of these tasks? Can you hire a virtual assistant to handle your Pinterest or other social media? How about getting some guest posts if writing content isn’t your strong suit? In my case, I am not able to hire out any of these tasks, so my only option is to change my posting schedule for the time being, but I’m okay with that.

Relationships

The next question to ask is how is this thing impacting others in your life? I know I haven’t had much extra time since I started blogging almost two years ago. I work on the blog each night and constantly throughout the day. I’m always participating in blogging threads on social media, trying to keep up with Pinterest, coming up with blog topics, finding images etc. If I don’t get my posts done on time, I will work on the blog early in the morning as well. Sometimes, it’s way too much. It doesn’t leave much time for myself or my daughter. On the weekends, I write my posts for the week, but I can’t get it all done in the evenings, so that only leaves the day time when I should be playing with Rosebud. It makes me feel guilty because I want to be successful with this blog, but I want to spend time with Rosebud as well. What is more important? Obviously, it’s Rosebud. She’s only little once and I don’t want to regret not spending enough time with her. I may not even have this blog in the future, so while it’s important to me right now, it might not always be. While my blog is tied in with my long-term goals, it’s not essential in this moment. When you are thinking of changing something in your life, ask yourself if it will get you closer to achieving your long-term goals. If not, then you have your answer.

Self Care

There’s that all too common phrase, self-care. It gets thrown around a lot, but it is important. you definitely need a break if whatever it is you are doing stops you from taking care of yourself. Even if you are busy, you need at least a few minutes each day to recharge. When I stopped to think about it, working on the blog has taken up so much of my free time. For the past two years, I’ve barely written in my journal, stopped doing most of my other hobbies and don’t get enough sleep. It has felt good to do other things again. I’ve actually been able to write in my journal, watch some new tv shows and have started a new friendship. It’s been nice to do something different. I’ve also needed to focus energy on my future home business which has been a huge factor in my break from the blog.

How does it feel?

Do you feel energized? Do you love what you are doing? Are you excited about it? Does it bring you joy? If your answer is yes to these questions, keep doing what you are doing. Does it make you feel depleted, overwhelmed, tired, down or just plain bored? If you answered yes to those questions, it’s time to change it up. If you are blogging, maybe you need to find a new topic that you are passionate about. If you are still passionate about your topic, but just need some new inspiration, a break out in the real world can do that. If you are doing something other than blogging, you can ask yourself these same questions to figure out what you need to do.

It’s often overlooked, but really take the time to notice how your body is feeling. I’ve been feeling drained and practicing some self-care has helped. What does self-care look like for you? Does it consist of a warm bubble bath or an early morning run? Self-care is different for everyone, so try a variety of things to see what works best for you.

Now that I have some of my struggles with blogging out in the open, I feel less guilt about not posting. It’s okay to step back. It’s okay to take a break. It’s okay to drop something altogether. Most things are not permanent decisions. To summarize, here are some questions to ask yourself before taking that much needed break. Is it causing too much stress in your life? Is it negatively impacting your relationships? Do you have time for self-care? Is it essential for achieving your long-term goals? Finally, how does it make you feel in your body? The answers to those questions can help you take the next steps and make the decision that is right for you. Are you struggling with burnout or knowing when to take a break? Tell me in the comments.

10 Comments

Blogging

How to Leave a Good Blog Comment

June 24, 2019

You know what really makes my day? Getting a really good comment on one of my posts. Blogging is hard work. I write content, do a bit of research, find images, create pins and then promote posts once they are published. This process is the same for every post. When I get a really thoughtful comment, it makes my efforts worth it. When I have taught someone something, made them feel less alone or simply made them think from a different perspective, I have achieved my overall goal for this blog.

If you are a blogger, there are several reasons why you should make commenting apart of your blogging routine. First, comments are what connect you with other bloggers. It is recommended that you find several blogs that you really enjoy within your niche and comment on them regularly. This way, you are building a relationship with other bloggers in your niche and bringing traffic back to your blog. They may start commenting on your blog as well making it a win-win for both of you. Next, comments help with SEO. A comment that uses key words from your post will help your posts rank higher when searching on Google. Finally, comments equal back links to your site. The more back links you have, the more credible your website will be and your domain authority will go up.

If you aren’t commenting or getting comments, you are missing out, but the important thing is your comment should be meaningful and strategic. How do you do that? Well, that’s what I’ll be going over in this post. I’m not an expert on everything blogging, but I have had other blogs in the past and A Flourishing Rose has been up and running for over a year now. With my previous blog, I got over 100 followers by simply commenting on other blogs. I did not have much of a social media presence back then and was blogging by trial and error. It didn’t take me long to figure out that commenting was the best way to build up my network.

Make It Meaningful

When you leave a comment, you want to show the blogger that you are interested in his or her post. If you just say something like, “good article” or “great post”, that doesn’t tell the blogger anything. Why was it a great post? To leave a good comment, here are some questions to ask yourself. The answers will help you leave a good comment.

What did I like about this particular post?

What did this post teach me?

Can I relate to something in this post?

Did this post make me think differently and if so, what changed my mind?

What is your response to the call to action in the post?

Is there something you can add that the blogger missed?

Did you disagree with something in the post? If so, what is it?

Did the post inspire you to do something? If so, what?

Commenting Takes Time

In order to leave a good comment, you need to take the time to read the entire post. It’s painfully obvious when someone leaves a comment without reading the post. Those comments are often generic, but if you read the post, you can answer one of the above questions or think of an entirely different response that is unique. Another reason to read the post is to find the call to action. I often put them towards the end of my posts, but there can be questions throughout. For example, a call to action might ask, “what does your self-care routine look like? Tell me in the comments.” Other calls to action may be that the blogger asks you to try the recipe, download a printable, watch a video, click on links for further reading etc. These are all things you can respond to when commenting.

Keep SEO in Mind

As I said above, when you leave a comment, it becomes apart of that bloggers post whether it is good or bad. Everything in that post can be searchable through Google or another search engine. Assuming that the blogger is paying attention to SEO, you’ll want to sneak some key words into your comments to help that blogger’s posts rank higher with Google. A comment like, “thanks for posting” does not add to the posts value. However, if the post is about baby lead weening, it’s safe to assume that “baby lead weening” is one of the key word phrases for that post.

Here’s an example of a good comment. “I want to try baby lead weening with my daughter. I think we will try cooked carrots and sweet potatoes for her first foods. Thank you for sharing the feeding tips and the suggestions for baby’s first foods. I have bookmarked the list.” Do you see how I included some key words, mentioned which foods I would try and let the blogger know what I appreciated about their post?

Here’s another example of a wonderful comment from one of my lovely readers. Rose writes, “Oh, man. I don’t think I could have read when the air hits your brain. I am not squeamish about very much but I think the situations would’ve gotten me more than the medical things. I congratulate you on 50 reads. I’d love to know what’s on your TBR list for 2019!” Not only was it obvious that she read my post as she mentioned specific books that I read, but she gave me an idea for a future post. She also gave me something to respond to as she continued the conversation from my post. I like to respond to every comment I get, so it definitely helps when there is substance to the comment. You don’t have to write an essay, but you want to write at least two or three sentences.

Be Careful About Link Dropping

If you only leave a comment to drop your links, that will be obvious. Not only is it rude, but it appears spammy. If you want to link drop, here a couple things to consider. Does that link have anything to do with the blogger’s post? For example, with my previous blog, I did a weekly favorites series where I’d round up a list of my favorite blog postseach week. When I published the post, I’d leave a comment on each person’s post that I linked to letting them know. I wouldbn’t just link drop and run though. Here’s an example.

“Your ice cream cone sensory bin is adorable. I will have to try it with my preschool class. I have included your post on my weekly favorites list which can be found here. Thank you for sharing this wonderful idea.” It took time, but I would get lots of gratitude and appreciation for sharing their posts.

Link dropping can be a slippery slope, but if you feel it relates to the bloggers original post or it contributes meaningfully to the conversation, you can include it, but I’d be cautious. My final note about links is that you definitely want to include your blog url in the appropriate box. That is what will drive traffic back to your blog. Most comment forms have fields for your name, E-mail address, blog url and comment.

Summary

To summarize, a good comment asks a question, answers a question or provides a different perspective. In short, it brings something new to the conversation. Some rules of thumb for commenting include read the entire post, give the comment some substance, keep the blogger’s key words in mind and don’t link drop unless their are special circumstances. Is there anything I forgot? What makes a good comment for you? Scroll down and let me know.

9 Comments

Blogging, Motherhood

How To Get Through Blogging BurnOut

May 28, 2019

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, I’ve talked about creating a set schedule and sticking to it. Posting on a regular schedule is an important part of a successful blog. That way, your audience knows what to expect. I’ve been trying hard to get my posts out on Tuesdays and Fridays, but things have been different over these past few weeks. I’m lucky to get posts out on time if at all. I know there’s been silence for about two weeks now because honestly I’ve had no motivation to write. I’ve still been actively promoting my blog on social media, updating old affiliate links and creating new pins, but I haven’t done what I love most, writing and creating new content.

My reality is that I’m a working mom and I don’t want every waking moment that I’m not at work to be spent on this blog. While I love blogging, I still need to spend plenty of time with Rosebud and I need time for myself. Time where I can just relax to enjoy a book or a tv show instead of typing away on the keyboard. I’ve worked on my blog almost every night for a year straight and I finally needed a break. I’d look at my long list of post ideas and none of them stood out. Then I felt guilty for feeling unmotivated and lazy. Yeah. I could just drag myself out of bed even earlier again or stay up past midnight to force myself to write another post that my heart isn’t in or I could just take a break and come back refreshed. Obviously, I’ve made the second choice. I wondered if other bloggers were dealing with burn out, so I reached out to one of my mom blogger groups on Facebook. I asked them what to do when I feel overwhelmed with blogging. I asked what I should do when my motivation isn’t there and I just can’t get it together. They gave me some great ideas and I wanted to share them with you.

Reset Your Priorities

Ashley from A Sweet Life with Style.

Totally a newbie here, but I had to really take a step back and reset my priorities. As much as I love blogging and influencing, I had to realize it was taking away from what matters most – my kids and leaving me COMPLETELY overwhelmed. I am still overwhelmed every single day but at least there isn’t guilt of not being with my kids on top of that ! lol no advice.. but definitely can relate!

Take A Break

Stacy from Protecting Your Pennies.

Honestly, I just take a break. Probably not the best thing to do but I do. I’m working now to build up some posts that I can have ready to go and saved that would be applicable at anytime so that I can schedule those if I am having an off week or 2.

Repurpose Old Content

Heather whose blog is still brand new and under construction suggests repurposing old content? Hire out a blog post? I’m struggling with a husband working random hours (nurse; so he’s on 3 days, off 4 and in my hair!), plus one kid in school, the other I’m working with preK stuff till he starts preK this fall. I’m trying to batch work. And getting up early. But take time for you, too. If you’re burnt out you won’t be good to anyone. Write random thoughts about that down (maybe you’ll be able to bring it together for a post of burnout/reviving yourself). Start posts and ideas randomly, as you can, so you have something underway in the future. You can always add to it and then finish it up in weeks like this. Do a quick ‘live’ video for your audience. Something to say hey, I’m a mama, taking some me time but I’ll be back. Update an old post and repost it. I hope some of these ideas are helpful.

Write Just to Write

Kaci from Mykew.net.

Don’t be too hard on yourself because life happens. Maybe try writing just to write vs trying to “write a blog”. I’ve had to do that a couple times and ended up with a couple blog posts at the end of it because I felt like I was being real.

Create A Schedule

Jho from Empowered Moms at Home.

What I did is wake up earlier than the kids. They sleep very late, like 11pm-12 midnight, and wake up late around 10-11am. So I wake up at 7am or try to… Sometimes I wake up at 9am and work on my blog during weekdays. I find it helps that I only publish every other week. I’ll do weekly soon, but for now I can’t put so much since I’m still on the foundation/learning stage. I still am overwhelmed, but having a daily&weekly schedule to follow helps a lot.

Find a Blogging Group

Tanya from The Mama Life.

I am in a wonderful group on Twitter and we do guest blogs and such when we find we are burnt out. It happens more than not. II work a full-time job as well as parent. You get the point. I took a two month break from writing anything but continued to share content on my social network and repost older posts. My traffic hasn’t declined and my audience is understanding….

Write Posts in Advance

Britta from HomeSweetHomeMaker.

When I do get in the mood I write forever 🙂 Last week I wrote 10 blog posts! I also keep a calendar to schedule them out. I do one post each week because that seems to be what I can keep up with. I always do the month in advance, that way if I get in a rut I know that month is at least taken care of. So in May, I’m working on June’s. So if I don’t write at all in May because I wasn’t feeling it, May was already done in April and I still have time before June gets here!!!

I also keep a LONG list of ideas. So if something pops into my mind while I’m driving or shopping I jot it down and keep a list at the end of my calendar. Then when I need an idea I write that in in the calendar. If I can’t get into it when the time comes I’ll push that idea out a few months and pick another topic.

I used to try to write each post as it came to me and that was so stressful. Writing in advance and scheduling my posts is SO. MUCH. EASIER.

I write the article, do the featured image and pin on Canva and add them in, then schedule it. The day or day after it posts, when I have time, I pin it a few times and get it on the share schedules. 🙂

You can’t expect yourself to always be motivated. Find a way to organize things so that it works according to your schedule.

I only have one child and stay at home, but I still have other responsibilities. I spent about 30-90 minutes daily on my blog. I do it with my cup of coffee while my toddler eats breakfast. This is when I do the share threads. I set aside one nap time each week to work on writing. 🙂 That’s it.

Really, it’s all about organization. Once you figure out a schedule it isn’t hard.

I want to thank these amazing bloggers for their suggestions. They gave me the push I needed and gave me inspiration to put this post together. Blogging is more difficult than it looks. There is a lot more involved than most people imagine, but when my creativity is flowing, I really enjoy it. Burnout can exist no matter the job or activity if your life is out of balance. This wonderful post written by Beth from Balancing Bravely lists 8 Surprising Lessons About Burnout that are Essential for Working Mom Success. Is there anything we missed? How do you get through blogging burnout? Tell me in the comments.

13 Comments

Blogging, Personal Development

My OneYear Blogging Anniversary

March 19, 2019

A year ago today, I published my first post here on this blog. I hear a lot of people say that they are afraid to start a blog, so they spend months and months planning all the details. They get everything set up first. The website, the social media, they have their theme perfect etc. Not me. I just wrote and when I thought it was good enough, I clicked the publish button. That’s not to say I didn’t give my blog any thought. I did. I struggled to come up with a name. I had created another blog, published one post and decided it wasn’t the direction I wanted to go. I tested out Blogger and WordPress. I did some research about which platform would be best and which hosting company would meet my needs. Eventually I settled on one, but I didn’t have any content planned. I figured I’d write whatever comes to mind. This brings me to the first lesson I learned with the launch of my new blog.

Make a Plan

I knew from the beginning I wanted to monetize my blog, but it sounds silly not to plan ahead when it could potentially become a business. I suppose it’s apart of my self limiting beliefs. Sometimes I wonder who will read my blog? Will anyone care about what I have to say? Then will anyone buy the products I recommend? The only way to know is to try, but there has to be strategy involved. Over the past year, I didn’t make a dime, but I’ve learned to plan ahead. I have a master list of posts, a posting schedule that I stick to as much as possible and am working on strategies for using social media to bring traffic to my blog. I also have a strategy for working on posts. I start with a basic outline or full rough draft depending on how well my writing comes together. Next, I do some editing and then search for pictures. Usually this takes place over multiple days. By the final day, I’m making the final edits, adding tags and finally creating a pin image before publishing. I still write from the heart, but there is now a method to this madness.

Community is Everything

In the blogging world, you need to connect with other bloggers. Facebook groups have become so valuable to me in the past year. If it weren’t for the members of these groups, my blog would get virtually no traffic. Something that I already understood was the importance of commenting on others blogs. This is one way to build a connection. Yes, it leaves a back link to your site, but more importantly you are giving attention to another blogger’s work and often times, they will reciprocate. I love getting comments on my blog. My greatest accomplishments are the comments where readers tell me, “I really needed to read this today.” Making someone feel less alone and or offering support to other moms is the whole reason I created this blog. I like sharing children’s activities, but the posts I love the most are the ones where I share something more meaningful. Something that can connect with other human beings on a deeper level. If I’ve done that, then I’ve succeeded.

Flexibility

When I first created the blog, I was on fire. I had so many ideas. I was posting a lot more. I knew consistency was key, but I ran out of steam quickly. Life got busy and I started feeling guilty if I didn’t post every day or three times per week. Now I’m lucky if I post twice which is my goal, but I’ve learned that one really great post is better than five posts that were thrown together at the last minute. I feel guilty about posting less, but I’ve learned that I need to use my time and energy wisely. I need to spend time with Rosebud. I need to occasionally take a night for self care. Sometimes I just need to step away from the screen and that’s okay. Building a following, monetization and my overall goal of using my blog as apart of my future business is going slower than I would like, but that has to be okay if I don’t want to become totally burnt out.

It’s Hard Work

I knew blogging wasn’t easy, but I had no idea there was so much involved. I spend a lot of time creating content, but you know what takes up just as much time? Promotion on social media. Not only self promotion, but sharing and commenting on other people’s content. Remember I said we needed to build community? Well, making those connections is hard work. You have to keep commenting and keep sharing content so that fellow bloggers will comment on and share yours as well. I never realized how much time it would take to build up a following on social media. These days, most blogs are on multiple platforms which can be a full-time job in itself. I’ve learned that I can’t always be on social media posting every day. Although you need to keep posting to keep your followers engaged, I don’t have enough hours in the day, but I do my best to keep everything up to date.

There’s Still a lot to Learn

Finally, I’ve realized that there’s still so much to learn. I’m starting to explore seo. Pinterest is barely accessible, but I have been working with it over the past month. I will write more about that in a future post, but it’s another platform to get used to. I’ve recently began using Amazon affiliate links again. I have to redo the links in my previous posts, but I will be working hard to create content that make people interested in the products. I still have some things to learn about affiliate marketing. I’m always trying to improve my writing and to generate more ideas. There is always room for improvement, but at the same time, I have to be proud of what I’ve learned so far. I never thought I could set this blog up on my own, but I have. I didn’t know if I’d still be up and running after a year, but here I am.

Here’s to another year of blogging, learning, growing and achieving my blogging goals. what are your blogging goals? What are your biggest accomplishments so far? Tell me in the comments.

13 Comments

Parenting, Toddlers

11 Lessons A Toddler Can Teach You

March 25, 2018

Here are some lessons that I’ve learned since Rosebud has brightened up my life.

11. Talk to the cats as if they will respond. Tell them about your day, get them involved in what you are doing even when you are brushing your teeth.

10. Always eat your veggies first. It’s the best part of the meal!

9. If anyone is unwell in the house including the animals, you must get your doctors kit and get to work.

8. Sparkles in any form must be noticed and commented on.

7. You can always pretend that something is something other than what it is at any time. It shows your creativity and imagination.

6. You must always eat with a fork even if the food is pretend. It’s polite.

5. It’s okay to tell someone that you don’t like something they did unless they’ve cooked you a meal. In that case, you have to tell them the food is delicious even if you avoid eating it at all costs.

4. If you are caught doing something you shouldn’t, yell really loud. It will distract them and maybe they won’t notice what you did.

3. If you find yourself in front of the tv, you should sing, dance or find some way to interact with it. It keeps your brain working.

2. If someone falls, you should always help them up.

1. Hugs and kisses solve most problems and you can never give too many of them.

What have your kids taught you? Tell me in the comments.

3 Comments