motherhood

Prime Day 2018: Bargains for Busy Moms

July 15, 2018

If you are a busy multitasking mom, there are never enough hours in the day so finding time and money saving apps, products or services can be a life saver. Anything that makes life less stressful or reduces the amount of rushing around is fantastic!

A busy mom working while playing with her daughter. For those who don’t know, Prime Day starts tomorrow, July 16th at 3 p.m. ET. I have been an Amazon Prime subscriber for years. You can find just about anything on Amazon and the best thing about Prime is that you can have these items shipped to your door. If you’re a Prime subscriber, two day shipping is free and one day shipping is only $3.99. They are offering a 30 day free trial for new subscribers. There is no better time to take advantage of this than on Prime day when you have access to tons of deals. Prime Day – Prime Membership $3 bounty

Some of the other Prime benefits include access to a large library of kindle books, access to their music streaming service and having clothing shipped right to your door. You can try the clothes on in the privacy of your own home and if you don’t like the clothing, you can return the package with no hassle. It’s already labeled so just drop it in the mailbox. I have yet to take advantage of the Amazon Fresh program as it’s not available in my area, but I am a huge fan of having groceries delivered to your door. If you are a busy mom, this can save you time and money so why not give it a try if it is available in your area?
Prime Day – Amazon Fresh $5 bounty

Another time saver is the Instant Pot. Moms on the message boards are crazy about these. On Prime Day, they usually have great deals on the Instant Pot. I love things that help me save time with meal prep so I really want to see what all the hype is about.
 A weekly schedule on a white board next to a cup of coffee.
It’s important that we do things for ourselves too, even when we are multitasking. Are there books that you have been dying to read? I joined Audible several years ago and have been addicted ever since. I can listen while I clean, sit outside and Audible books were a life saver during my nursing and pumping days. Audible is great for busy parents on the go as you can listen during your commute. for Prime day, Amazon is offering a 60% discount on an Audible subscription. Normally a membership is $14.95 per month, but for Prime day, it is $4.95 per month for new subscribers. If you enjoy audio books, this is worth taking advantage of.
Prime Day – Audible $10 bounty
If you prefer reading, Amazon offers a Kindle Unlimited subscription where you have access to millions of books for a monthly fee. Think of it as a library, but in digital form. You also get access to audio books and magazines with this subscription. For Prime Day, new subscribers get a three month subscription for 99 cents. I’ve been wanting to try Kindle Unlimited and this would be a great way to try it at very little cost. the great thing is you can access your books from the kindle app on any device. When I read kindle books, I use the app on my iPhone.

Prime Day – Kindle Unlimited $3 bounty
I’ve used Amazon’s subscribe and save feature on everything from diapers, to cat food and even batteries. If you have five items in your delivery, you save an additional 20% off your purchase. I love that essential items will arrive at my door each month and I don’t even have to think about them. I don’t have to make late night runs to the store for diapers. I don’t have to worry that the cats will run out of food. I can get great deals on essentials like soap and toothpaste. Also, I can try new products or find products that they have stopped carrying in the local stores. You can stop or modify subscriptions at any time. My only complaint is that you can’t pick the shipping date. there are times when I want my shipment to arrive sooner. Overall, it’s a great service. Here are some of the products you can subscribe to get each month.
I’ve been using these diapers since Rosebud was a newborn and they’ve worked wonderfully.
 
With a deal like this, you’ll have plenty of batteries. I was always in search of batteries before finding these because it seems every toy under the sun is battery operated.
 I can’t find these dryer sheets locally anymore, but I love the scent. Luckily they are apart of the Subscribe and Save program.
 
Since Rosebud isn’t potty trained yet, I’m still using these. They can ship right with the diapers or you can change the frequency of deliveries for each item.
 
I usually buy Sparkle paper towels, but you can find the brand of your choice.
 
I hope you have found this helpful. Enjoy Prime Day and happy shopping!

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Parenting, Personal Development, Self acceptance,, Uncategorized

Owning My Guilt

July 13, 2018

I'm reading Cara Alwill Leyba's new book, "Like She Owns The place”. 


 For those who don't know, Cara is an author and master life coach who works to help women empower themselves and change their mindset. I found her online several years ago and discovered that a lot of her message resonates with me.
One passage she wrote about guilt in, "Like She Owns the Place" stood out to me. She discusses the idea that women often feel guilty due to external forces. Such as ones culture, religion or the society they live in. It may come from childhood experiences or friends and family making them feel guilty. This may be intentional or not, but never the less, the guilt shows up. She poses the question, if you are not hurting yourself or anyone else, why feel guilty? Cara describes one situation where she was taking a day off from work, spending the day at home. Her plan was to binge watch a show and have a glass of wine. Meanwhile, her husband decided to reorganize a closet full of Christmas decorations. Seeing this, she felt guilty and went over to help, but he encouraged her to take time for herself. That’s the sign of a good man, by the way. She said she went back to watch tv, but it didn’t come naturally to her. She felt guilty for taking time for herself and not working.
I often feel guilty over things like this. Today, my mom took Rosebud so that I could rest as I haven’t been feeling well. I can’t rest though because I start feeling guilty and thinking of everything I need to do. If I’m napping on the couch, the laundry isn’t getting done. The dishes are piled up in the sink. Rosebud's toys need to be rotated. Countertops need to be dusted. That’s just the house work. Then there’s the work you actually get paid for. I don’t feel guilty about taking time away from my job outside the home, but I feel guilt over not working on transcription stuff. I think to myself, I should be transcribing practice files or doing the business plan paper work. As with the blog posts, I set imaginary deadlines and the guilt sets in.

This week is supposed to be my vacation, but I’m having trouble just letting it be. I always have to fill my time and not necessarily with the things I enjoy. I need to feel productive even in times when I should be resting. The mom guilt is never ending. While Rosebud is not here, I’ve spent much of my time doing things for her instead of myself. I’ve washed toys, did laundry and prepared her dinner for later. It's one way to ease the guilt of taking time away from her. Then again, when I'm spending time with her just playing, I get that nagging feeling about the house work. Then when I'm cleaning or doing other things, I feel guilty about giving her screen time. While she's away, I’ve been pondering how to take away the pacifier. Should I try a gradual approach or go cold turkey? This was prompted by her visit to the dentist this morning. In between cleaning and thoughts of the annoying paci, I wonder how she’s doing. What is she doing right now? Has she napped? What did she eat for lunch? Then I think maybe I should watch some videos of her. Oh, wait... I better get back to work.

As Cara points out in her book, when we are old, what will we be worrying about? Will we be worried about all the times we should’ve cleaned closets, typed up that report or swept the kitchen floor? Definitely not! We will be remembering things we enjoyed. The times with our loved ones, the things we’ve created or times we did something crazy, fun and memorable. The fact is, we all need time to replenish ourselves. If we don't get that, we become unhappy and lose sight of our strengths, passions and our joy. We need to start erasing some of this guilt. If not, what are we teaching our children and what are we doing to our emotional well-being? I’m finally in my element. I’m taking the time to write which makes me feel lighter and taps into my creative side. I’m sitting outside enjoying the breeze on my face, the shade of a tree and listening to the birds over head.

Here are some of Cara's other books if you are interested.
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      Parenting
            
        First Sleep Over
        
          June 1, 2018                  

      
      
      

        
        
Rosebud slept over at my mom’s last night because I went to a coworker’s retirement dinner. She did well. She went to sleep last night with no fuss. She didn’t even want to be rocked at first, which was similar to the night before. Tuesday night was the first time ever that she didn’t want me to rock her. I was sad about that. My baby is growing up. I love having our snuggle time before bed. I don’t see her all night so I like that time to tell her I love her and just sit with her, holding her, talking to her and smelling the scent of her body wash. This time flies so fast. She’s already doing preschooler things when it seems that yesterday I brought her home from the hospital. She slept until 8:15 this morning which she rarely does here. She’s usually an early riser.
I talked to her last night on Face Time to tell her good night, but honestly she wasn’t that interested. She was going through her bag and when she found her toothbrush she was off for the sink. She started running down the hallway leaving the phone behind. She said a quick good night as she was headed for the sink and that was that. I’m glad she feels secure when I’m not around, but I’m a little sad too. That’s what being a parent is all about. You are preparing them to be independent and to go out into the world. Whether it’s just the first sleep over or the huge step of going off to college. There’s always a delicate balance of holding on and letting go.

The funny thing is, I often want a break like this. A time with no kids to worry about, but I worry anyway. I wonder what she’s doing and what she is thinking about. I always think I’ll have a bunch of free time to write, reorganize closets, go through photos etc. You know, the stuff you never get around to doing. Then when the time comes, you do what you would’ve done anyway. Last night, I put her clothes away, exercised and wrote to a friend. Those are things I do most nights when Rosebud is here. The only different thing I did was put the brand new light pink sheets that I found on sale yesterday on my bed. It has been good for me though. Although I miss her, I got a good nights sleep and I was able to do some chores this morning. I haven’t had time to myself in ages. and it was good for me to reboot. Kid free time is wonderful, but I was so glad to finally see her this morning.

      


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      Parenting
            
        Thank You, Mom
        
          May 16, 2018                  

      
      
      

        
        
I wanted to write this entry on Mothers Day, but I was spending time with my mom and Rosebud. My mom came over for the afternoon and made me a floral arrangement for my door. Rosebud and I took her out to dinner. I’ve been thinking about all the lessons my mom has taught me and the things she has done for me over the years. Here are just a few of them.

1. She taught me to be strong. She raised my brothers and I as a single mother. She always worked full-time, made home cooked meals, spent time with us while taking care of her parents. Now that I am a single mom who works while raising a child and doing my best to create a loving home for her, I appreciate what my mom did even more. Sometimes she seemed stressed and impatient back then and now I’m the one who gets stressed and impatient. Now I understand why. When you’re running late for work, when you just want to get dinner on the table or when you just want a quiet moment to yourself. When you live for your kids hugs and laughter, but at the same time you live for a brief period of time when you can relax.
2. She was my biggest advocate. At school when teachers couldn’t or wouldn’t teach me. When the school’s administration would argue about paying for adaptive technology. When some people thought I’d be better educated if I were sent to a school out of state. She spoke out. She got them to give me what I needed and she knew and believed I’d be better off living at home with my family. I’d be a completely different person today if she hadn’t advocated for me in this way. She hasn’t been the best at speaking up for herself and often let people treat her poorly, but she’s a mama bear when it comes to getting her children what they need. So she has taught me two things. First to advocate for my own children and second, to advocate for myself and not let others walk all over me. That has been the case for a long time and I am doing the best to break that cycle for myself, but most of all for Rosebud.
3. She reminds me everyday to be kind. I’ll admit I’m pretty jaded and don’t have much faith in most people. I would do anything for those close to my heart, but it takes me a long time to build trust. My mom on the other hand, believes the best in everyone. She’s always the first to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, a second chance or a helping hand. I usually get annoyed with her over this because she’s kind to people over and over again, but then she is disappointed when they don’t treat her with kindness in return. I can appreciate her kindness and generosity and feel it has made a huge impact on the way I am raising Rosebud. I focus a lot on empathy, doing things for others, being polite etc. Sometimes a little kindness goes a long way and in today’s society we could definitely use a little more kindness.
4. She instilled the love of gift giving. Gift giving has always been important to me. when I read the book of the five love languages, I discovered that my love language is gifts. This  stems from my childhood. My mom has always been a gift giver. She goes all out on Christmas and often buys little gifts just because. That’s how I learned to show my love and appreciation. Now I’m the one going all out on holidays and buying gifts just because. If I see something that someone in my life would love, I have to get it for them. It means a lot to me to make them smile and for me a gift is usually tied to a memory. So even if I no longer have contact with a person but think of them fondly, I still have their gift and the memory.
5. She’s given me a strong work ethic. I believe that in order to get anywhere, you need to work hard. My mom has always been a worker and has devoted so much time and energy to her jobs over the years. I think there is an amazing sense of pride and accomplishment when you can look at the things you have and know that you got them because you worked for them. You made them happen! I’ve gotten the jobs I’ve had because I worked hard to prove myself. Often times without pay in the beginning. I’m able to maintain my home, care for my pets and provide for Rosebud because I work hard. I am also working hard to change my career path and better myself. These things take time and dedication. I don’t believe in sitting around and waiting for things to come to me. You have to put out the effort and make your own opportunities. While I have a strong work ethic like my mom’s, I’ve come to realize the importance of creating a work life balance. It’s very important to me that I spend as much time as possible with Rosebud. She’ll only be little once and this time is so precious.
In reality, all of parenting is a balancing act. If you work, you have to balance between work and family. If you stay at home, you have to balance between your kids and seeing yourself as a whole being instead of just someone’s mom. Then when it comes to your own parents, you have to take the lessons they taught you and apply them in your own parenting. Sometimes that means leaving some of those lessons behind. Maybe there’s something you want to do better. Maybe there’s something you wish your parents had done that you are now doing with your own children. These things can bring up complicated feelings and can be difficult to sort out.
I want to end this entry by thanking my mom for being there for me all these years. Thank you for supporting me even when we didn’t agree. Thank you for caring for Rosebud. Thank you for believing in me. Thank you for loving me even when I’m not easy to be around. Thank you for all the little things you do day after day that make my life just a little easier. They are very much appreciated.
My mom would never want a picture of herself on here so I will share another floral arrangement she made for me. She loves to make these and I like how it is her way of being creative. She doesn’t bring out her creative side too often.


      


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      Infants, Parenting, Toddlers
            
        No More Bottles!
        
          April 30, 2018                  

      
      
      

        
        
Rosebud loves her food and loves her routines so when it comes to the bottle, she’s been very attached to it. When Rosebud was born, we started having feeding troubles right off the bat so I had to introduce formula in the first few days of her life. She preferred the bottles since she would get more milk at a faster rate. This obviously made nursing a struggle and I pushed through for several months before we finally found a rhythm. Rosebud got bottles when I was working and nursing when I was at home. Maybe I will do another post later specifically about the feeding problems and how we got past them, but this post is about how we said Bye Bye to the Bottle for good.

I wanted to stop nursing when she turned a year old because by then I was tired of it, but Rosebud had other plans. I slowly started to cut out feedings and eventually it had stopped by 18 months. One of the ways I cut out feedings was by replacing them with bottles of milk which Rosebud liked. She got very attached to the bottles again and it simply became a substitute for nursing. This is why she was still having two bottles a day even after she turned two.

I started reducing the amount of milk in the bottles which she was totally fine with. I tried putting milk in different cups, but she would never drink it. She has been drinking water from a cup since she was six months old and more recently I’ve given her juice in a cup, but she’ll take one sip of milk and put it back on the counter telling me she doesn’t like it. I’ve tried role modeling by drinking milk with my meals, sharing my milk with her etc. I tried not allowing her to have bottles at all and only offering cups of milk, but she refuses and will go days without milk. I’ve started introducing foods with more calcium because I was worried about her not drinking her milk.

Last week, I told her that we were all done with bottles because she is a big girl and big girls drink milk out of a cup. This makes her sad and occasionally she will ask for a bottle. She was tearful when asking for one this morning, but I reminded her that she’s a big girl and doesn’t need a bottle anymore. I told her it was okay to miss her bottles, but that we could snuggle while she drinks her milk from a cup the same way we would snuggle when she drinks bottles. That seemed to help.

This past weekend I caved and bought some chocolate and strawberry sirup to flavor her milk. My mom had suggested this, but I didn’t want to do this because I thought if she wouldn’t drink plain milk, then I didn’t want her to start getting sugary replacements. I did some searching online and this strategy has seemed to work for many parents so I’m giving it a try. So far, it has worked. She has been drinking her milk and seems to like both flavors. My plan is to decrease the amount of sirup little by little until she is back to drinking plain milk again. Distraction has worked as well. If she’s busy playing, she is less likely to think of asking for a bottle.

Since we have gone a week without them, I packed them away in a box. The next thing to go is the pacifier, but I don’t want to take all her comforts away at once. My baby girl is growing up and it’s happening way too fast! It seems like yesterday when I brought her home and now she’s talking in full sentences, climbing up the huge slides on the playground and we are the beginning stages of potty training. She has a mind of her own and she knows what she is ready to do. I encourage her to take the next steps, but I also remember to let her go at her own pace. Sometimes that has meant taking a step back and trying again later. It is a learning process for both of us. What helped your toddler give up the bottle? Tell me in the comments.

      


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      Parenting
            
        Learning to Slow Down
        
          April 24, 2018                  

      
      
      

        
        
This past weekend, the weather was nice for a change so Rosebud and I spent lots of time outside. When we go for walks, Rosebud usually likes to go in the stroller, but I asked if she wanted to walk without it and she did. We walked down our street and found a side path that takes us to our mailboxes. that path is sort of in the woods, but it connects our street with another street in the neighborhood. It is also connected to a small playground nearby. There is only a large climber with a slide there, but if you get bored in your own backyard, there is another option. Anyway, it can be slow walking with a toddler. She likes to stop at each yard and point something out or pick up random stuff on the side of the road.
This started to get old and I found myself getting frustrated at stopping every two seconds, but then I thought this is her walk and normally I’d encourage exploring and looking at the details so I started asking her about everything we were seeing and hearing. She saw leaves blowing in the wind, different decorations in people’s yards, big trees, dogs, cars driving by and kids playing. We heard wind chimes, airplanes, dogs barking, a baby crying, animals moving around in the trees and birds singing. She stopped to pick up rocks, acorns, pinecones, leaves and sticks. She wanted to put everything in her pockets. A couple of times, she even stopped to pick up trash. I’m all for picking up the trash and can’t stand it when people litter, I don’t want her doing it because of her tendency to put everything in her mouth. You never know where that comes from and what kind of germs it could be carrying. I’m always worrying about what she’s putting in her mouth and that’s one of the reasons I’m not a huge fan of outdoor time.
I love being outdoors. I love nature and getting fresh air. It’s good for both of us. Outdoor time is great for burning off energy and doing activities that Rosebud can’t do indoors. I know how important outside play is, but I get anxious about her possibly swallowing a rock, eating mouth fulls of dirt which she did today or if she tries to run off. My yard is fenced in, but there are lots of places to escape to if we go walking or if we go to the playground that is not fenced in. I know some of this will get better as she gets older and maybe I’ll enjoy outside play more. For now, I will do my best to enjoy these moments outside even if we’ve stopped for the fiftieth time while walking down our short path to the mailboxes because Rosebud is learning and appreciating the world around her.
Our next adventure is filling the sand box. Rosebud loves to dig in the dirt so I know she’ll love it.

      


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      Parenting
            
        When Plans Get in the Way
        
          April 17, 2018                  

      
      
      

        
        
I think of myself as organized and like to think things through. I prefer to stick to my routines until I get bored out of my mind and then I’ll finally switch it up. I usually prefer familiarity over adventure. Although I’m not opposed to trying new things, it sometimes takes some convincing. I like to think of myself as a planner with flexibility. Meaning I like to make plans, but they aren’t set in stone. I’m okay with a last minute change or two, but generally I like to keep moving in the direction I was headed. That whole version of myself flew out the window when I became a parent. Everything I had imagined and planned out in my head was turned completely up-side-down.
I had always planned on having children, but it was a question of when. I imagined I’d be married, working in a good job and living in a house with a yard. You know… The perfect picture of the perfect family. When I found out I was pregnant, I had none of those things so I often wondered what my child’s life would be like. Would I be able to give her everything I wanted to? I had been creating this picture in my head for years. I was inspired by the stay at home moms who blogged about their homemade baby foods, the cool activities they did with their kids, the cute little lunches they prepared, the play dates, the classes, the freedom and ability to stay home with their children. Somehow, I imagined that’s where I’d be. At home with my baby. I’d prepare homemade baby foods. I’d do all these cool activities with my kids because I have an early childhood education background. Then I’d have something interesting to blog about.
Well, that’s not how things turned out. I’m a working mom who is often too tired when she gets home to prepare and actually do activities. Most nights, we settle for coloring with crayons and a blank notebook. We might snuggle in the chair reading a book or singing songs because that doesn’t require any extra preparation. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by working with children all day and want to zone out, but I know I can’t. My daughter is depending on me to talk to her and play with her.

I never planned on co-sleeping because they say it’s not safe. Plus how can you get a good nights sleep with a baby in your bed? My need for sleep quickly became much more important than any of the crazy ideas I had before I became a parent. Rosebud slept with me for the first fifteen months of her life and contrary to my previous beliefs, I got more rest with her right next to me. I know because occasionally I’d try putting her in her own bed and the separation was harder on me.
I was never going to be a mom who breast-fed. I thought it’d be gross. No one in my family had breast-fed so I knew little about it. I had made up my mind on that years ago, but while I was pregnant, there was so much pressure from society and the research pointing out all the benefits eventually sold me on the idea. Not to mention the convenience of not having to get up and make bottles in the middle of the night. I had no idea how hard it would be and the guilt I would feel when it wasn’t working. I struggled and struggled, but Rosebud and I eventually figured it out together. I never planned on feeling so strongly or being so persistent. She was breast-fed, bottle fed and had to have formula supplementation for a while, but she was and is healthy.

I was going to make her baby food, but then life got in the way. I was tired. I didn’t want to spend so much time in the kitchen so the convenience of store bought food won out. I’ve come to realize it’s not the end of the world. I’m not a bad parent because I didn’t purée her food. So what if it was already prepared. So what if I can’t always buy organic or buy the best brand on the shelf. Isn’t it more important that she is fed and healthy?
In the end, these are short seasons. In parenting there will always be something we are questioning. We will make mistakes. Things will not go as planned. That is the nature of children. They usually march to the beat of their own drum. I think these plans we make or expectations we have end up hurting us and getting the way. They can make us feel ashamed, guilty or not good enough. When in reality, it’s not working because we’ve set the bar extremely high. I think compassion is the key here. I have found strength in letting some of my plans go and focusing on what really matters. The good stuff like health, laughter, time spent together and showing Rosebud that she is loved.

      


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      Personal Development, Uncategorized
            
        Adding a Little Luxury to Your Life
        
          April 8, 2018

This episode of the Style Your Mind podcast called, Little Luxuries got me thinking about ways I pamper myself. Some people think luxuries have to be super expensive, but there are some things you can do to pamper yourself that cost very little. For some people, luxuries may be days at the spa, vacations or buying top of the line items. Those things may be great, but not everyone can do that all the time. To me, luxuries are those things you do for yourself that make you feel your best. They are the things that lift you up. These things or rituals don’t even have to take up a lot of time.

Get Outside

One thing that makes me feel my best is spending time out in nature. When I start to feel down or if I start to get antsy, I find that taking a walk helps. I put Rosebud in the stroller and we go. usually we just walk around the neighborhood, but there are always new things for Rosebud to see and it gives me time to clear my head. I can look at the sky and notice the clouds. I see the trees, a beautiful sunset or hear the different birds. Just being around the sights and sounds of nature is relaxing. During the spring and summer months, I’ll often go sit out in the back yard while Rosebud naps because it is so peaceful.

I always enjoy being at the beach as well. It is my happy place even if I’m just sitting on the beach listening to the sound of the waves, looking at the sky and the ocean and feeling the sand under my feet. It’s amazing how it all comes together to make such a beautiful place.

Enhancing Your Space

A little luxury could be something you use to enhance your space. I love anything that smells good and lately I’ve been melting wax instead of lighting candles. I’ve found some amazing scents and the shapes they come in are so cute and decorative that you don’t want to melt them.

This strawberry scented cupcake looks good enough to eat, but I assure you, it’s wax. I will tell you all about this wax from Blended With Love in this review. It’s important that the space around me smells good so why not make it a little more luxurious than lighting a basic candle. Not that there’s anything wrong with candles. I have plenty of those too.

If you want to give yourself the gift of fresh flowers, I’ve found this fresh flower subscription.

Indulge

Buy or make yourself a sweet treat. Most people I know are doing their best to eat healthy, myself included, but sometimes it’s okay to indulge. Why not stop at a local bakery and get a small treat? Why not try that recipe you’ve always wanted to try? Maybe you really enjoy a special blend of coffee. Maybe a salty snack is more your thing. Whatever it is, it’s okay to enjoy it guilt freefrom time to time. A couple weeks ago, I tried a chocolate covered macaron from a local bakery. It was delicious! Was it good for me? Of course not, but do I regret it? No. I was having a rough day and needed a treat. I love to bake and try new recipes. I often share what I make with friends and family and it makes me feel great when I’ve found a new recipe that’s a keeper. I’m also happy when I’ve tried a new healthy option or recipe. When you know healthy food is giving you energy, that feels great as well.

Pampering Myself

After a long week if I really want to pamper myself, I take an epsom salt bath. I found this epsom salt on Amazon and it smells great.
 
I used to have some special lotion that I’d save for pampering myself, but I’ve started using them more often. I found this shea body butter from Victoria’s Secret a couple of years ago.
 
I’ve decided I don’t need to wait for special occasions to use the better lotion. Why not use it whenever I feel like it?

One more thing that I considder a little luxury is putting on jewelry. Before I had Rosebud, I almost always put on jewelry, but after I became a mom, I felt tired, overwhelmed and would forget to put it on or run out of time in the mornings. I’d think of it as I was out the door and then decide I wouldn’t want to take the extra minute to find the jewelry I wanted to wear. I mention this because putting on a bracelet or a pair of earings makes me feel more put together. There is something about it that starts my day off better. If I’ve had the time to put on jewelry, it means I wasn’t rushing around so much. When I’m not rushed, I’m much calmer and happier.

these are just a few things that make me feel my best and recharge me. The things that make you feel your best and recharge you might be totally different. What do you do for yourself that you considder a luxury?

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Parenting, Toddlers

11 Lessons A Toddler Can Teach You

March 25, 2018

Here are some lessons that I’ve learned since Rosebud has brightened up my life.

11. Talk to the cats as if they will respond. Tell them about your day, get them involved in what you are doing even when you are brushing your teeth.

10. Always eat your veggies first. It’s the best part of the meal!

9. If anyone is unwell in the house including the animals, you must get your doctors kit and get to work.

8. Sparkles in any form must be noticed and commented on.

7. You can always pretend that something is something other than what it is at any time. It shows your creativity and imagination.

6. You must always eat with a fork even if the food is pretend. It’s polite.

5. It’s okay to tell someone that you don’t like something they did unless they’ve cooked you a meal. In that case, you have to tell them the food is delicious even if you avoid eating it at all costs.

4. If you are caught doing something you shouldn’t, yell really loud. It will distract them and maybe they won’t notice what you did.

3. If you find yourself in front of the tv, you should sing, dance or find some way to interact with it. It keeps your brain working.

2. If someone falls, you should always help them up.

1. Hugs and kisses solve most problems and you can never give too many of them.

What have your kids taught you? Tell me in the comments.

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Awareness, Parenting

I Fired My Nurse

March 21, 2018

The inspiration for this post came this afternoon after an experience at the grocery store. I hate grocery shopping with a firey passion for a lot of reasons which mostly involve the people I encounter there. This particular store plays some sort of monopoly where you get tickets every time you shop there. The only way you ever benefit from the game is if you shop there often and collect lots of tickets. Since I only shop there once in a blue moon, I don’t bother playing. My mom was at the store with me and she went ahead of me in the checkout line. The cashiers always ask if you are collecting the tickets when they start ringing up your items so they asked my mom when she was purchasing her items. then when it was my turn, I had mentioned an something I forgot to get so my mom went to get it for me. Meanwhile, the cashier asks me if I’m collecting tickets. I told her no, but within a few seconds, my mom returns. The cashier proceeds to ask her if I’m collecting tickets and of course she got the same answer. You’re probably thinking, what’s the big deal? Maybe she didn’t hear you. Maybe she spaced out. While those things may be true, situations like these happen to me all the time. Situations where people talk around me like I’m not there and questioning my abilities and maybe even my intelligence at times.

Normally when I write in my blog, I only focus on the positive and rarely ever write about something so personal, but I suppose that isn’t exactly authentic. People who know me in real life know that I’m visually impaired, but most people who I interact with online don’t. I usually dread telling people and do whatever I can to hide or minimize it. It’s because I know people will think of me differently once they know. I’m having second thoughts about posting this as I type. Anyway, I left the store today in frustration and I didn’t say anything, but there have been times where I’ve stood up to that.

While I was in the hospital after Rosebud was born, there were mostly wonderful nurses who were caring and supportive. However, there was one who was absolutely horrible. She was rough while drawing blood from my baby, she was abrupt and generally had a negative attitude. It was obvious that I made her uncomfortable and that she didn’t think I could handle caring for my newborn. I’ll mention that I had a c-section due to complications and it was impacting my ability to breastfeed. Sometimes women who have had c-sections take longer to produce milk because of hormones and the trauma to the body. Anyway, for whatever reason, Rosebud wasn’t feeding very well and like a lot of mothers, I was having trouble getting her to latch. Most of the nurses were fine with helping me with this. Rosebud and I were starting to figure it out, but it was taking time.

This nurse would make me feel like crap every time I asked for her help. She’d say things like, “we’re working on independence today.” She kept going on and on about how I needed to get up and do things for myself which I had been. I was up and walking around a couple hours after she was born which the other nurses were surprised about. I would call for help with something and she’d take 20 minutes or more to finally show up. She asked what I did for work. I told her that I worked in childcare. Then she asks if I know how to change a diaper so I told her that I’ve changed hundreds, probably thousands of diapers over the years. She started insisting I needed to get up and change Rosebud’s diaper because we were yet again working on independence. I was under doctors orders that I wasn’t supposed to be moving around too much yet, but I would’ve changed her if she had brought her over to my bed, but instead she changed her across the room. Eventually she told me she wasn’t going to help me with any of the latching problems. that I was on my own. I’m sure there was a lot more that was said. It’s been over two years now and since I was hormonal and sleep deprived, I can’t remember every detail, but I finally lost it. When the supervising nurse came in, I told her that I didn’t want that nurse coming into my room again. I didn’t want her near me or my baby. the charge nurse said that she’d make sure she didn’t bother me again. She told me that the nurse was acting inappropriate and rude and encouraged me to fill out the survey that they send out to all patients which I did.

Parenting is challenging enough without dealing with someone questioning your abilities at every turn. I was confident in my ability to care for her, but breastfeeding was totally new to me. No one in my family had done it so I had little support. They didn’t understand why I wanted to continue with it, but I knew it was good for Rosebud. So when I got home, I started researching and talking to other mothers. Eventually everything worked itself out because of my persistence. And, yes, I did it independently. Everything from the research, to working with Rosebud to fix our feeding issues.

I want other mothers to know that yes, you can fire your nurses. I did not know that and only learned that out of desparation. Also, it’s okay to advocate for yourself. It’s hard and sometimes you don’t know if it’s worth it or not, but it usually is. It’s not okay for people to treat me like that and I wish they wouldn’t, but at times proving people wrong has been a strong motivation for me. It has pushed me hard to achieve my goals. Sometimes it’s okay and absolutely necessary to surround yourself with a protective bubble.

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